Written by Alan D. Whitcomb for Jace Marie Whitcomb's memorial service
"Prayer:
Compassionate and loving God, yours is the beauty of childhood, and yours is the fullness of years. Comfort us in our sorrow, strengthen us with hope, and breathe peace into our troubled hearts. Assure us that the love we had for Jace was not in vain-indeed make it a part of the store of goodness that you even now puring out upon her in your eternal kingdom. Thank you for the assurance that she lives forever in the joy and peace of your presence. Guide us through this time of sadness with the light of your live and the strength of your compassion- we ask it in the of Christ Jesus. Amen.
Words of Consolation:
Our hearts have been full of questions- the most important of them being "how did this happen?" and
why did this happen?" These questions have not only been in the hearts and minds of Josh and Ashleigh, but inside all of us. We are not here today to answer these questions. Rather we are here to mourn- to mourn and to commend Jace into God's care, and to ask God to help us- and to most especially help Josh and Ashleigh through this tragedy.
In the most beautiful of gardens, even those tended by the most skillful of botanists, there is an occasional rose that buds, but never opens. In all respects the rose is like all the others, but something keeps it from blooming. It fades away- or disappears- without having reached maturity.
What happens in nature's garden happens once in a while also in the garden of God's human family. A baby is born, beautiful, precious, but fails to come to its rightful unfolding. This child, like the bud that never fully opens, is gathered back into God's heavenly garden of souls-where all imperfections are made perfect; all injustices made right; all mysteries are explained;and all sorrows turned to happiness.
Today we mourn our loss of such a child. We weep, just as Jesus himself wept at the death of his friend Lazarus. Even if we knew the answers to the questions that rise so naturally to our hearts and minds at times like this, there still would be no adequate explanation for this loss. It is painful.
And I believe it is also painful to God, who created the world intending for it to be perfect. As Jesus himself said, "It is not the will of your Father that one of these little ones should perish."
And, as promised to us b y God through the prophet Isaiah, there will come a time when there is a new heaven and a new earth- a time when never again will there be in it an infant who lives but a few days, or an old man does not live out his years- a time so glorious in its presences that a person who is only a hundred will be though to be a mere youth.
But this is not yet that time.
Rather this is the time when heaven yet remains above- and the earth below. There are angels above. Angels who watch over the little ones of this earth. There is a special place in the heart of God and amonghts the angels for the little ones of this world just as there is a special place in our hearts today for Jace.
And so we weep at what has happened.
And so too-God weeps with us.
What can be said that might ease the pain or assuage the grief that you- and all of us feel today?
We can express our sympathy and sorrow.
We can offer words of love, care and concern.
We can say we will pray for you.
But other than that we don't know what to say about these things.
Maybe it is because people don't know what to say that they sometimes say the wrong things.
Some people may try to say that Jace's death at this time was God's will. Please, don't believe them. The God we worship, the God who watches over us, doesn't will the death of babies or the pain of their parents. Many things that happen in this world are not the will of God. That is part of the price of the freedom we have been given by God.
Some people may say to you that God wanted Jace in heaven with Him. While I am confident God has welcomed Jace into His kingdom, I am sure that God did not want her to go this early just so that He could have her there.
Some people may seek to comfort you by saying to you that you are young and that you can have other children. That may be true, but other children will not replace Jace. She was her own person. The empty place that her death has left in your heart will not be filled simply because you have another child, nor should it be. Every child is unique and precious.
I am sure the people who say things like this say them with a desire to comfort. They want to say something that will help. Bless them for it- but know that we are faced with a mystery- the mystery of life- and of death- in which there are no easy answers.
It is important to know that God is for you. God did not do this to you. God did not "will" Jace's death, or your pain. But God is with you in the midst of it all and will help you through it. God is for you. Even more, God understands your pain. God had a son who died also.
Now, you may think, "Sure, but Jesus rose from the dead." Well, its because Jesus rose to a new life that you can be confident that Jace has new life also, one that can never be snatched away from her- or from you Lord.
Today- in our grief- know this- that there is another angel in heaven. Cling to that hope- that promise of our God- and allow your tears to wash away the pain in the days and months to come.
As a Christian, it is my conviction that our loved ones do move on into that nearer presence of God, where they will no longer hunger, no longer thirst, no more pain. Because Jesus is in the midst of the throne and He will be their Shepard, and He will guide them to springs of living water; and God himself will wipe away every tear from their eyes."
This was written by my brother in law Alan Whitcomb. He wrote this for our daughter Jace's memorial service and never had an opportunity to share it, taking it upon myself, I am sharing it to the world for him. He is an amazing friend, son, brother, brother in law, and uncle. Thank you to Alan for writing this for the family and Jace. It is beautiful, and no words can express how much peace this gave both Josh and I and the family. You are an excellent writer, and I hope you know that. We love you and I am sure our little Buggie Jace is looking down on you and smiling at what a wonderful uncle she has. Love you and your kind words. Ashleigh and Josh
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